God’s Plan For Your Marriage

God’s Plan For

Your Marriage

A clear concise study guide

• for pre-marital counsel,

• for marital help, or

• for marital renewal

• for Godly order in your home.

Covering:

Marriage I – God’s Design for the Home

Marriage II – The Role of the Wife

Marriage III – The Role of the Husband

Marriage IV – The Role of ONE FLESH

Marriage V – The Role of ONE FLESH In Communication

Marriage VI – The Heritage of God = Children

By Pastor Ed Rice

Good Samaritan Baptist Church

54 Main St, Dresden NY 14441

www.gsbaptistchurch.com

Copyright 2013 by Pastor Edward Rice English Scripture quotations are taken from the Authorized King James Bible.

Commercial Rights Reserved. For non-commercial purposes any essay of this compilation may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means electronic, mechanical, photocopy, recording, or otherwise in the service of our Creator, Lord and Saviour, Jesus Christ the Righteous. This constitutes the written permission of the author.

Published by E.G.RicePublishing

via GSBaptistChurch.com

Good Samaritan Baptist Church

54 Main St. Box 99, Dresden, NY 14441

http://stores.lulu.com/GSBaptistChurch

Compiled and Edited by Pastor Edward Rice

Cover design and Photographs by Author

Layout by Author

Marriage I – God’s Design for the Home

Memory Verse: Psalm 101:2 I will behave myself wisely in a perfect way. O when wilt thou come unto me? I will walk within my house with a perfect heart.	Daily Bible Readings Sun Eph 6, Heb 12:7 Mon Gen 2:18-25 Tue Heb 13:4, Psalm 68:6 Wed Matt 19:4-6 Thur Prov 31 Fri Eph 5:23-33 Sat Jos 24:15, Prov 5

“We believe that the home and marriage are holy and ordained by God; that in marriage the husband and wife become one flesh and establish a home; that the husband is to be the head of the home, the wife an obedient help meet to the husband and the children are to obey and honor their parents.”

The Authority of the Bible

What is the Role of the Bible in My Life?

What separates Christianity from any “religion” in the world is its claim to an absolute, written authority from God. Having the Word of God is essential to a Christian’s growth in grace and knowledge of Jesus Christ. The standards, by which a Christian is to govern his life in every detail, are found in the pages of the Word of God.

This study is to acquaint one with the basics of the Bible and how it relates to their everyday life, so they can begin to understand how God’s principles are to guide every facet of their marriage and their daily walk with Jesus Christ. A worthy, and worthwhile task.

I Introduction to the Bible.

It is universally accepted that there are two fundamental sources of human knowledge: reason and experience. Both are essential to the understanding of the world around us. Yet, reason and experience do not answer the most profound and important questions of life. Where did I come from? Why am I here? Where am I going? Where is there another source of knowledge that carries us beyond the limitations of human reason and experience. The source that answers these three most important questions of life, is the Holy Bible. It has been put in acronym as: Basic Instruction Before Leaving Earth.

The revelation of God to man, called the Holy Bible, teaches us that God has revealed Himself and His commandments in Holy Scripture, or sacred writings. In these Scriptures we have direct access to an infinite and personal God who reveals himself as the Self-Existent-One. The Bible says he created all things for His pleasure. It reveals that we are finite and He is infinite. He is a God who has revealed himself to be omnipotent or all powerful, omniscient or all knowing, omnipresent or present everywhere, and immutable or unchanging. We were created to know such a God and his Scriptures are worthy of our continual study.

God created man in his image and likeness, and gave him distinct responsibilities, so that God could could commune with man. Man disobeyed God, and rebelled against his Creator. As time passed, humanity distanced itself from God, but he revealed himself more and more, and what was revealed he had recorded in sacred writings called Scripture. The Holy Bible reveals all we know about God, His will, His ways, and His purposes for mankind. The Bible, alone, answers those three questions posed by man. At the completion of The New Testament, God’s written revelation was complete. Look at that fact carefully worded in Revelation 22:18-19.

For I testify unto every man that heareth the words of the prophecy of this book, If any man shall add unto these things, God shall add unto him the plagues that are written in this book: And if any man shall take away from the words of the book of this prophecy, God shall take away his part out of the book of life, and out of the holy city, and from the things which are written in this book.

The Scriptures are unique in several ways:

The Bible is a book which is composed of 66 books written by more than forty authors over a period of more than 2,000 years. It has 69 books of the Old Testament, written before God sent his Only Begotten Son as the Messiah, and 27 books of the New Testament, written after Jesus the Christ¹ came to earth. It is totally accurate in its record of history, revelation, and prophecy, the 66 books fitting together as though one man wrote it without one contradiction. The orchestration of the whole Bible is awesome to behold. For example the Bible has 1,118 chapter divisions and the very middle verses of the Bible is Psalms 118:8 “It is better to trust in the LORD than to put confidence in man.“; the very middle words are “The LORD”, and the presence of all caps indicates this is the very personal name of God.

The purpose of Scripture in life and in marriage.

The Scriptures have been inspired and preserved by God that we might have an inerrant (without error) and infallible (never failing) guide that will bring us to salvation and daily sanctification. Remember that man was created in the image and likeness of God so that he could commune man, and man could commune with God, which is commonly called fellowship. While here on this earth man can fulfill God’s purposes of fellowship, giving glory to God in every way. The Bible puts it “And thou shalt love the LORD thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might.” (ref Deut 6:5, 30:6, Joshua 22:5, Psalm 31:23, Matt 22:37, Mark 12:30, and Luke 10:27) That is our purpose in life. That is our purpose in marriage. That is our purpose in our home.

The Scriptures say of themselves in 2Tim 3:16-17:

“All scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness: That the man of God may be perfect, throughly furnished unto all good works.“

In this Scripture the teachings of the Bible fall into four distinct purposes. They are profitable for:

1) Doctrine = What is right.

2) Reproof = What is not right.

3) Correction = How to get right.

4) Instruction in Righteousness = How to stay right.

Why? “… that the man of God may be perfect, thoroughly furnished unto all good works” (3:17)

Some Myths about the Bible, from the cartoon above, are

>> MYTH – The Bible is just another religious book written by men.

>> MYTH – The Bible can only be understood by “clergy” after years of formal education.

>> MYTH – In order to know the true meaning of the Bible you must know Greek or Hebrew.

>> TRUTH – God’s Word is the best Marriage Manual you could read.

>> It is written by God, and He says so.

>> It is understandable by all, it only takes His Spirit

>> It is perfectly accurately in English, in the King James Bible.

>> “That is your interpretation!” does not apply when reading the Holy Bible. Its exact interpretation, word for word, was put into English by 77 unparalleled linguistic scholars over a period of 7 years. They were sponsored, paid, and protected by King James , a King of England, and finished their translation work in 1611 AD. It is the Authorized Translation, the King James Bible.

QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS

Reason and experience do not answer the three most important questions in life. What are these three questions?

A.___________________________________________

B.___________________________________________

C.___________________________________________

There is an inerrant source for human knowledge, it is not reason or experience, what is it, and its acronym?

____________________________________________

The inspired teachings of Scripture have four major purposes. List them and explain.

A.___________________________________________

B.___________________________________________

C.___________________________________________

D.__________________________________________

What three truths debunk the three major myths about the Holy Bible?

A.___________________________________________

B.___________________________________________

C.___________________________________________

The promise of God for life, marriage and home.

The whole premise for the next few lessons on the home, all the promises made, all the instructions given, are from the Word of God, The Holy Bible. In marriage one needs to make a commitment to their mate for life, and a commitment to order their home and their life in accordance to God’s instructions. A home can then be a paradise here on earth. These instructions are outlined in the next few lessons. With such a life time commitment, examine some of the promises that God makes:

(Please fill in blanks using only the King James, Authorized Version of the Bible)

Josh 1:7 Only be thou ______________ and very ______________, that thou mayest observe to do according to _______ _______ _______, which Moses my servant commanded thee: turn not from it to the right hand or to the left, that thou mayest ______________ whithersoever thou goest.

8 This book of the law shall not depart out of thy mouth; but thou shalt _____________________ therein day and night, that thou mayest observe to do according to all that is written therein: for then thou shalt make thy way ______________, and then thou shalt have good________.

Psalm 1:1 ______________ is the man that walketh not in the counsel of the ungodly, nor standeth in the way of sinners, nor sitteth in the seat of the scornful.

2 But his delight is in the _______ _______ _______ LORD; and in his law doth he ______________ day and night.

3 And he shall be like a ______________ planted by the rivers of water, that bringeth forth his fruit in his season; his leaf also shall not wither; and whatsoever he doeth shall _______.

Matt 7:24 Therefore whosoever heareth these sayings of mine, and ___________ _______, I will liken him unto a

wise man, which built his ______________ upon a rock:

John 13:17 If ye know these things, ______________ are ye if ye do them.

There are a myriad of other Scriptures that spell out the promises for following God’s plan in your marriage. As you “Study to shew thyself approved unto God, a workman that needeth not to be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth.” you can have the peaceful, joyful, happy home that God intends for man.

The key is simple:

The cartoon above shows God’s plan for your home; 1) A lifetime commitment, 2) daily Bible study and learning; 3) daily prayer together; 4) Regular Worship and Bible Teaching (in a Bible believing Church) and 5) hard work with regular maintenance.

Marriage is Holy and Ordained of God

It was in the Garden of Eden that God himself planned the idea of marriage. Get a KJV Bible and fill in the blanks in these verses:

Gene 2:18 And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be ______________; I will make him an ______________ ______________ for him.

The word ‘meet‘ is not common in our English, an older dictionary gives an appropriate synonym of “appropriate.” Substitute that synonym in the phrase below:

I will make him an help ________________ for him.

God did not make woman as a help-mate, but as a help-meet.

God made the kind of man who needed a wife. God knew the need of man’s heart, soul, and mind, and so God declared it was not goof for man to live without a wife. God made a woman, Eve, because she would fulfill the natural longings and fit in with the natural and normal happy life of Adam. Marriage was ordained by God.

God intended that a marriage union be indivisible, till death do us part. “What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.” The sacred marriage vow provides a physical, emotional and spiritual security between a man and a woman that cannot be achieved in any other sort of agreement. That three dimensional security is to permeate the stable home, and makes it the only suitable platform for child rearing. The term ‘divorce’ is introduced in the law of God only because of the hardness of man’s heart. (Mark 10:4-9) It destroys the physical, emotional, and spiritual security in a home and it is never the optimal solution. Matt 19:4-6 is emphatic “…they twain shall be ______________ ____________. (Matt 19:5) In that light, divorce, being all to common today is against God’s precepts. Matthew 19:6 says: Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let

______ ________ put ______________.

Examine carefully, then, three Biblical outcomes for, or purposes in, marriage. Consciously understanding these outcomes makes good inroads to produce a marriage that is a taste of paradise one earth.

The 3×3 Essentials

We need to be Loved,

We need to Love.

We need to be Significant,

We need to give Significance.

We need Security,

We need to provide Security.

That is: emotional love,

love on a spiritual plane,

and physical love.

It is significance emotionally,

significance spiritually,

and physically significance.

It is secure emotionally,

secure spiritually,

and secure physically.

Why does one marry?

The model here shows three human needs on three different levels, making this “The 3by3 Essentials” for a joyful life. Certainly, the Bible assures us that the Lord Jesus Christ can meet all our needs on all three levels. But God ordained and organized marriage to meet these 3by3 essentials for a man and a woman. Child rearing is intended in a home where these 3by3 essentials thrive without hypocrisy.

The need to love and be loved.

What is True Love? Love is the mental, emotional, and physical, self-less desire to fill the needs of another. Love is NOT a fuzzy way of feeling, NOR is it something you fall into; it is a command.

Mutual love is the selfless concern two people have for each other. There are four kinds of love in the Bible and all four should be found in a functional home. There is the Greek word eros, for physical love, storge, for parental and family affections, phillia, for human affection or friendship, and there is agape, for self giving,selfless love, or the purest of love.

This love in marriage must have a depth that reaches through physical, emotional, and then spiritual dimension. Even when this love is unrequited it is to be pure, but when it is reciprocated it can bring unmitigated joy into the marriage.

The need to be significant and to give significance.

What is Significance? One is significant when there is an ongoing concern for where they are at what they are doing, what they are thinking, and what they are feeling. Imagine the loneliness of going through life being significant to no one. Imagine the selfishness of going through life with no one else significant to you.

Mutual significance has been described as, “Having a significant other, or a soul-mate.” There are a myriad ways that one shows physical, emotional and spiritual significance. There are as many ways to neglect significance. Neglected significance evaporates into nothingness.

This significance in marriage must have a depth that reaches through physical, emotional, and then spiritual dimension. Even when this significance is unrequited it is to be pure, but when it is reciprocated it can bring unmitigated joy into the marriage.

The need to be secure and to provide security.

What is Security. In a promise, it is, “I will never leave thee, I will never forsake thee².” And therein, never means never.

God ordains a marriage and a home where a man and a woman leave the security of their father and their mother and cleave together to become one flesh. They, alone, must now provide the genuine security to one another. Physical security is a place to dwell, and physical protection from a hostile world. Emotional security is place to feel, and an emotional protection of those feelings from any hostile environment. Spiritual security is place to be a free spirit, and a spiritual protection of that spirit from the spirit of Godlessness.

This security in marriage must have a depth that reaches through physical, emotional, and then spiritual dimension. These three dimension are secured through the promise, yea the vow, “I will never leave thee, I will never forsake thee.” You might attain a common-law marriage without the vow, but you will not attain a Godly marriage and a Godly home without the marriage vow.

Marriage II – The Role of the Wife

Memory Verse: Eph 5:22-24 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. 24 Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.	Daily Bible Readings Sun Gen 3:1-16 Mon Numbers 30 Tue Psalm 128 Wed Prov 5:15-21 Thur Song 1:1-2:17 Fri Rom 7:1-6 Sat Song 3:1-4:16

“We believe that the home and marriage is holy and ordained by God; that in marriage the husband and wife become one flesh and establish a home; that the husband is to be the head of the home, the wife an appropriate help to the husband and the children are to obey and honor their parents.”

God’s order in the Home, – God’s role for the Woman

God begins his instructions on marriage with instructions to the wife. In God’s creation account the woman is the completer of man. The success or failure of a home hinges on how well the wife fills that role of completer. Ladies, please examine this lesson carefully, and Gentlemen, you need to be familiar with this lesson because God holds you responsible for the leadership in every aspect of your home.

This study is to acquaint you with the basics of the role of the woman in God’s creation, in accordance with God’s Word. It conflicts with what our society (especially our media) has pumped into our heads since our birth, so clear your mind and pay particularly close attention to the Scriptures for this study.

Role of a Woman in Creation

(Please fill in blanks using only the King James, Authorized Version of the Bible)

Gene 2:18 And the LORD God said, It is _______ ______________ that the man should be alone; I will make him an ____________ ____________ for him.

In the previous lesson we explored an appropriate synonym for “meet.” Write it in the sentence below: The woman is to be an ____________________ help to the man.

The Scripture continues:

20 And Adam gave names to all cattle, and to the fowl of the air, and to every beast of the field; but for Adam there was _______ ______________ an ______________ ______________ for him.

21 And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof; 22 And the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man.

23 And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and ______________ of my ______________: she shall be called ___________, because she was taken out of Man.

24 Therefore shall a man ______________ his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one ______________. 25 And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.

The woman was made for man. Literally as a completer of man, or as an appropriate help for the man. Consequently a woman will find fulfillment and completion when she fills the role, and accomplishes the purpose for which God made her. A woman filling the role that God made her for will find complete fulfillment and peace that can be found in no other way. A woman may say that this kind of submission to a man is not in her nature, and she would be correct. Man (mankind) has a fallen nature and does not naturally do what God intended for the creature made in God’s image and likeness.. The age old question here is “Do you want to simply do what is in your nature, or do you want to follow God’s plan for your life, and your home? ” The two do not naturally line up. When God’s plan goes counter to our nature and contrary to the world’s advice, it is all the more important to trust and obey.

Wives be Subject to Husbands

When God gives orders to husbands and wives about their treatment of each other in the Bible, He speaks to wives first then to husbands. When He commands fathers and children about their duties to each other, He commands children first, then fathers. He commands servants first, then masters; subjects first then rulers. God leaves no room for the excuses of the wife who does not want to obey her husband, or the children who will not obey their father. Eph 5:22 is the heart of this teaching, which is repeated several times throughout Scriptures.

Wives, ______________ yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.

Since this word is often ugly in our society, it may be helpful to write in the margin of your Bible:

Submission is the overwhelming

consideration of the needs of others.

Note also that Christians are to submit one to another. (vr.21)

A woman begins down a road of rebellion in the home by first finding several excuses to disregard God’s command. The home has a leader and its subjects. The Husband is appointed by God, as that ruler, the wife is to be subject to her husband.

People always have plausible excuses for not doing right. Women give many reasons for not being subject to their husbands as God commands. They are excuses, whereby we call God’s plan, and God’s Holy Word, untrue or ineffective.

The Bible and the Role of the Woman.

The Bible is quite emphatic about the role of the woman. This emphasis is applied collaterally in the home, in the church and in the society. The rebellion against God’s authority is exposed collaterally with rebellion in the home, rebellion in the church, and rebellion in society. Comprehending God’s emphasis on the role of the woman in the home requires that we see it universally applicable in the church and in the Godly society.

God’s role for woman is emphasized in, and illustrated in three particular commands of God. Woman are not to lead in public prayer. The letter to Timothy, explaining how to behave in the Church (1Tim 3:15)is very clear on this point. Leadership in prayer is for men not women. “I will therefore men (males) pray everywhere, lifting up holy hands without wrath and doubting. In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with embroidered hair, or gold, or pearls or costly array; but which becometh woman professing Godliness) with good works” (1Tim 2:8).

The phrase “in like manner” does not connect the woman’s role to leading in public prayer, it connects the woman’s modest apparel, shamefacedness and sobriety to doing it “without wrath and doubting.” Also taken out of context from this text is the broidered hair, gold and pearls. This Scripture is about the kind of attitude a woman professing Godliness should have. It has been used by some to forbid women from wearing makeup or jewelry. Such a legalistic stance gives little thought to the actual context of this command. The context teaches who should and should not be leading in prayer.

Secondly, women should not be in a position to teac a m an. Again this letter to Timothy is emphatic. “Let the woman learn in silence with all subjection. But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor usurp authority over a man, but to be in silence” (1Tim 2:11-12). Again, this Scripture might easily betaken out of context. The context is who is to be doing the teaching. The scoffer dismisses this whole text because a woman keeping silence is beyond anything they could imagine. Women roll their eyes when this Scripture is read because they refuse to acknowledge the context and its truth. Women should not teach men, the Holy Bible says so.

Pause here to understand God’s threefold reasoning behind these two commands. “For Adam was first formed, then Eve” (2:13). God first resorts back to his purpose in creation. The woman was created to be an appropriate help and companion to the man. “And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived was in the transgression” (2:14). The woman is a whole different emotional and hormonal package than the man. One is built for confrontational leadership decisions. One is built for non-confrontational compromised solution finding, and she is called the weaker vessel. (1Pet 3:7) It is not politically correct to say any of that but is is certainly Biblically correct. You must choose which correctness you will pursue, and there is not non-confrontational compromised solution between the two.

The threefold in the chord of God’s reasoning, reasoning which refuses women from leading men in prayer and in teaching men in class, is found in the next verse. “Notwithstanding she shall be saved in childbearing, if they continue in faith and charity and holiness with sobriety” (2:15). Being “saved” in this verse has nothing to do with a soul’s salvation. In the Holy Bible soul salvation is only done by grace through faith; not of works (Eph 2:8-9), when we “confess with they mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him (the Lord Jesus Christ) from the dead” (Rom 10:9). then, and only then, can one have soul salvation. This verse, in the letter to Timothy, is referencing where the woman’s greatest value is, what her function is life is, what her emotional and physiological function was designed to do, a woman was designed for motherhood. A woman, who will accept that role by faith and charity, and holiness with sobriety, has her perfected place, knows her place, and stays in the role for which God created her.

When God revealed to Joshua, his role for his life, he said, “This book of the law shall not depart out of they mouth; but thou shalt meditate therein day and nigh, that thou mayest observe to do according to all that is written therein: for then thous chalt make they way prosperous, and then thou shalt have good success” (Joshua 1:8). This is the woman’s role as defined by God in His Holy Word. Submission to that role will bring posterity and good success. Rebellion against it is the norm for our society, and unfortunately for our church leaders. Choosing it for your home will bring God’s blessing.

The Bible further clarifies that the woman should not prophecy. Prophesying, in the Bible, is not foretelling the future. Prophesying is the receipt and delivery of a message from the Lord. Today, anyone who can read and has God’s sixty six books of completed revelation, has received a message from the Lord. Set aside the shenanigans of Benny Hin, Oral Roberts, Charles Taze Russel, and Joseph Smith, and recognize them as charlatans who claim to receive extra-Biblical revelations. Those who would take a Bible and proclaim “Thus saith the Lord,” are prophesying. And according to the Word of God, women are refused that position.

The Church at Corinth was having problems with this prophesying issue. They did not yet have the 27 books of the New Testament Scripture and in Paul’s letter of reproof women where forbidden to prophesy or to speak in tongues. “Let your women keep silence in the churches; for it is not permitted unto them to speak; but they are commanded to be under obedience, as also saith the law” (1Cor 14:34) This whole discourse on prophesying, and the woman’s role, begins back in chapter eleven, but here it concludes very concisely, “And if they (women who wish to prophesy) will learn anything, let them speak to their husbands at home: for it is a shame for women to speak in the Church” (14:35). This Scripture is dogmatic, and the principle that women are to know their position, is equally dogmatic. “But I would have you to know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God” (11:3).

Many think this Scripture in 1Cor 11, is about whether a woman should wear a head covering in Church. It is not. It is about whether we will recognize God’s plan and order in life. The woman is not to be the leader, she is not to prophesy, she is not to lead in prayer, and she is not to teach men. These three commands of God are justified in that 1) Adam was first formed, then Eve, 2) Adam was not deceived, the woman was, 3) the head of the woman is man (male), and 4) the woman has the physical, psychological, and emotional character for mothering, not for leadership.

Those who respond to these scriptures with the unbelievers cliche, “That is just your interpretation” are simply psoitionaing themselves to reject God’s role for the woman and press toward the more rebellions “woman libber’s” position. Those who acknowledge the truths of these Scriptures but then contend that it just doesn’t work for them, need to acknowledge Christ’s advice, “If ye³ know these things, happy are ye if ye do them” (John 13:17). There are also many who acknowledge these truths and pretend to abide by them, but their heart is not in it. Such are wolves in sheep’s clothing. And wolves in sheep’s clothing, especially when they live in the Church parsonage, do appreciable harm to the cause of Christ.

A woman who will acknowledge this as her role and goal for her life, “if they continue in faith and charity and holiness with sobriety,” can indeed have all spiritual blessings in heavenly places in Christ” (Eph 1:3). Marriage and home are meant to be a taste of paradise on Earth. A wife who takes up God’s will and calling for her life is an essential first step in achieving that paradise.

One Role in Home, Church, and Society

God does not have three sets of separate roles for the creatures made in his image and likeness, one for the home, one for the Church and one for society. God’s reules apply equally in the Christian house, the Church house, and the commercial house of business, and the White House of government. Where one has an ability to sway the world back to God’s ways they should. The ways and commands of Christ are rejected by the world., yea they are in an absolute rebellion against them, they actively hate them, and him. Our Lord Jesus said it would be that way. Sadly, it is just the same in what was in misnomer called the “Christian Church.” A “Church” that refuses to acknowledge and adopt the Bible truths about the role of women is to be labeled “apostate”, and a believer is to follow Christ’s command to “come out from among them and be ye separate” (2Cor 6:17). When pressed by society to work with or for the woman leadership which they have put into position a believer must make a decision. The decision is highlighted by Solomon between Proverbs 26:4 and 26:5. If you cannot remain in the situation and uphold Romans 12:18, “If it be possible, as much as little in you, live peaceably with all men.” If you are becoming a belligerent, hard to work with, “I am right and you are wrong”, pompous idiot, you should repent, or leave and live where you can put on Christ and be a Christian. There is no singular right answer that fits every situation. In the military I have worked with and for women who were just ignorant of everything Godly, women who were pompous and ungodly, and women who knew God’s role for them and were, as best as they were able, in a military leadership role, pretending to conform. You can be the salt of the earth in the worst of the world. Know and purpose that you will.

The First Years of Forever

In his book “The First Years of Forever”, Dr. Ed Wheat outlines these scriptural areas of “How to Love your husband.”

A. In Genesis you are “His Help Meet”. your Husbands self confidence rests in your hands for safe keeping. See Genesis 2:18-22

B. In Proverbs 31:10-31, “His Trusted Partner.” These 22 verses start with a different letter of the Hebrew alphabet and contain vast wisdom for a wife.

Prov 31:10 Who can find a ______________ woman? for her price is far above rubies. 11 The heart of her husband doth ______________ ______________ in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil. 12 She will do _______ ______________ and not evil all the days of her life. 25 Strength and honour are her clothing; and she shall rejoice in time to come. 26 She openeth her mouth with ______________; and in her tongue is the law of ______________. 27 She looketh well to the ______________ of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness. 28 Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he ______________ her.

C. In the Song of Solomon “His Darling, His Love” Observe the example of the Shulamite. If you would learn how to fuel the fires of an ongoing love affair with your husband, study her behavior and responses. Analyze them. You will find that her husband’s love making thrilled her, and she let him know it” She focuses her eyes and conversation on him when they were together, complimenting his appearance, expressing appreciation for his skillful lovemaking, and always communicating her high respect for him as a man.

D. In 1 Timothy “The Guide of His Household”

1Tim 5:14 I will therefore that the younger women marry, bear children, ______________ the ______________, give none occasion to the adversary to speak reproachfully.

E. In Titus “His Loving Wife” Titus 2:4 That they may teach the young women to be ______________, to ______________ their husbands, to love their children, 5 To be ___________, ______________, keepers at home, good, ______________ to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.

F. In Ephesians “His Submissive Wife” Eph 5:22 Wives, ______________ yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. 3 For the husband is the ______________ of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.

G. In 1 Peter “His Beautiful Wife” 1Pet 3:1 Likewise, ye wives, be in ______________ to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives; 2 While they behold your chaste ______________ coupled with fear. 3 Whose adorning let it not be that ______________ adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of ______________; 4 But let it be the ______________ man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a ______________ and ______________ spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price. 5 For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands:

6 Even as Sara obeyed Abraham, calling him ______________: whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement.

God Will Bless You as

You follow His Plan

A Bold Word about Dress and Modesty

There was a time, just a few years ago, when preaching against worldly dress was heard from fundamentalist and independent Baptist pulpits across the land. Some went extreme and attempted to enforce some overbearing rules about women and pants. Today, any kind of preaching about clothing has become an oddity, and the pants issue is an open embarrassment. Justly so. The resistance of the rock & roll culture to such preaching is so pervasive that many pastors have decided to ignore matters of dress altogether. To do so, however, is to ignore the fact that clothing is a language, and it communicates.

Two things might be communicated by improper dress and appearance. One must be careful about modesty, and one must be careful about gender.

In the book How to Marry the Man of Your Choice by Margaret Kent (New York: Warner Books, 1987), the secular author instructs women how to use clothing to “manipulate men.” She recommends body hugging skirts and revealing blouses: “Don’t let the power of clothing pass you by, for it can be a major asset in attracting men. … stir his sexual imagination without satisfying his curiosity about your body… To avoid being a nerd”, Kent continues, “wear clothing that follows the natural form of your body” (pp. 29, 32, 33). Kent observes that “shirt-type blouses with buttons on the front” send a signal of “easy access” (p. 35). As for pants on women, the author states that “jeans are likely to get a positive response because they are snug and outline the body; they also represent casualness” (p. 36). This reminds us that clothes can be be inherently immodest. The obvious purpose for these fashion is to tease men.

Gender confounding is also a major emphasis of the world’s rebellion against God’s commandments. Women dressing like men is the emphasis. Men dressing like women is an effeminate issue which is not as prominent in society, at least not while testosterone levels are maintained. But the drive for women wearing pants, pant suits, men’s shirts, ties, and butch hair is loud and brazen.

Marriage III – The Role of the Husband